Antigua Me Come From

I recently reclaimed my real last name - Weste (pronounced West, and honestly, truly, in full Caribbean accent, pronounced Wes).

Little did I know I’d do this just weeks before taking an ancestral journey to the Caribbean.

I’ve pushed away many parts of myself in this lifetime - my inner children, my inner feminine, and the stories tied to this last name.

Lately, I’ve been working on reclaiming all of myself - my inner children for the past couple of years, and in the last six months, my inner feminine (I now use all pronouns). For the last ten years, I rejected my last name, distancing myself from the intense emotional trauma tied to my father - and, by extension, his lineage.

Over the years, I’ve healed those deep wounds. I’ve found profound compassion for his intensity, his inability to emotionally regulate. I’ve come to understand that his trauma was shaped by the violent currents of history - the transatlantic slave trade, a wound that still bleeds through time.

So here we are - after using the last name Tree for the last 10+ years—reclaiming Weste. At first, I thought I reclaimed it simply because it’s my legal last name and what I use professionally. But truly, spiritually, I am discovering much, much more.

Sometime in the last couple of years, he told me he was trying to make me strong—that all the abuse was meant to fortify me.Too bad it didn’t work. At all. Lol. And that’s okay. We are here now. He apologized for everything two summers ago at a medicine sit I invited him to.

I wouldn’t take this healing journey back for anything. It has led me to understanding the nervous system, somatics, healing, the history of capitalism, emotional intelligence, and the impacts of racism—it has giving me context for the story of humanity. It has brought me to plant medicine and a global community of people who are returning to their embodiment, so many of us who have suffered deeply and are reclaiming every part of themselves like I am. And it has brought me back to my last name.

So here we are - after using the last name Tree for the last 10+ years—reclaiming Weste. At first, I thought I reclaimed it simply because it’s my legal last name and what I use professionally. But truly, spiritually, I am discovering much, much more.

In just one week, Antigua gave me stories. It reinvigorated my purpose and sense of self. It connected me to a village, a lineage, a family.

I am from a village people.

There are HUNDREDS of Weste’s. We obviously originate from Africa, but for the last 200+ years, we have lived in the most famous neighborhood and bay in Antigua - English Harbor (colonizer name, obviously).

I am from a village people. I am from a tribe. I am from a lineage and a family that has stuck together, supported each other, and endured for generations. There were 250+ people at my Grandmothers funeral.

The stories before this are hard to find - our records, like those of all Black people everywhere, were strategically stripped at the height of slavery.

The Caribbean was beautiful.

The Caribbean was hard.

I am from an island with 365 white-sand beaches, the most beautiful people, the most beautiful food, the land of sea and sun they say - yet the impacts of colonization and slavery are still perpetuated, rebranded as tourism. And still, we have community, and we rise...

I have said, and I will say again:

“The anti-Blackness on planet Earth is one of the saddest things humanity has to reckon with. When we start to see the deep tending and support of Black and Brown communities on planet earth, humanity will be well again. You think you'll be left out if you support us, but actually we want to feed you too.”

Black people are the most resilient and powerful beings on this planet - our power and innovation have touched every corner of the earth. From music to technology, mathematics to architecture, fashion to dance, food to environmental justice, the medical system, spirituality, and beyond.

We are royalty.

And Antigua Me Come From.